How to let go and forgive your spouse

Forgiveness is the first step towards healing in any relationship. How can you do it?
A compassionate heart, an open mind and a will to make your marriage flourish can make all the difference to the future of your relationship with your spouse.

Focus on the positives
Sure your partner caused you some pain by an act that was forgettable, but there must be many things about them that you love. Think of the times when your spouse went out of the way to please you or did something to bring a smile on your face. Doing so will remind you that your marriage is worth making the effort for, and will make it much easier for you to forgive your spouse. In the end, it is all about love.

Forgive from the heart
Whether you’re the husband or the wife, simply saying “I forgive you” does not amount to much if it doesn’t come from the heart. Your words may pacify your spouse momentarily but they will not lead to a peaceful resolution. It is important to internalize the feeling of forgiveness and come to terms with it. If you still find yourself thinking about your spouse’s mistakes and continue to bring them up in conversation, you probably haven’t forgiven them completely. Only when you are at peace with yourself, will you be able to maintain peace and love in your marriage.

Don’t dwell on the past
Nothing good ever came out of hanging on to old grudges. Raking up past issues and harping on your partner’s mistakes only compounds the feelings of negativity and creates rifts that are difficult to bridge. Every human being, including you, can make mistakes but how you let them affect your marriage is entirely your decision. Let bygones be bygones, embrace the present and work as a team to create a happy future.

It is for your own good
Bottled up feelings of hurt and resentment can eat you on the inside if you do not find a way to channel them out of your system. Not only do they make you a bitter and negative person, they also make your vulnerable to depression and health issues. Once you have addressed the issue with your partner and received an apology, it is in your own interest to treat the matter compassionately and bury the hatchet.

Resentment and grudges are toxins that threaten to weaken the foundation of your relationship if allowed to brew for too long. Letting go, on the other hand, lifts the burden off your chest and leads your relationship back on the path of normalcy. Which of these would you want choose?

We all have our imperfections, which is why nature has bestowed on us the ability to forgive. Forgiveness is a powerful human quality that gives a deeper meaning to our existence and helps us tide over life’s big and small obstacles.